Wrote. Erased.
Wrote again. Erased again.
I couldn't understand what was happening or why. Whenever I managed to write the title, the intro didn't come out right. And whenever the intro felt right, the title stayed unfinished. I went through this same cycle of writing and erasing for almost three hours.
In the end, I had nothing written, but I stayed calm within the chaos of my thoughts.
After three hours, I thought, let's skip today. One day wouldn't cost much. With that thought, I was about to give up on the day's effort.
But I wasn't sure if I should skip or not.
Everything I'd learned about effort and consistency came flooding back. Flashbacks of the times I'd faced the same kind of uncertainty and hadn't quit. I hadn't given up on my will then. I hadn't given up on turning my thoughts into words then.
Each time, I tried to view my uncertainty from a different perspective. The first time, I realized patience mattered - that I shouldn't be too anxious to write. The second time, I tried to reframe every thought instead of skipping. The third time I got blanked, I learned to draw on everything I'd learned before and start fresh again.
Three separate days, the same struggle, the same mistake - but a different perspective each time. And each time, the result was learning from the mistake instead of giving in to the urge to skip. The memory of those lessons gave me the patience to think and start writing again. And despite the blankness, I put every thought into words that day too.
But the urge to skip today made me realize something worth holding onto.
Skipping isn't a break in consistency. It doesn't mean a lack of effort. Skipping is a thought that erodes your willpower. It's what breaks your rhythm and makes you question your belief.
Doubting belief often ends up encouraging mistakes.
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