I Thought They Were Blogs Until I Read Them Again

Wasn't it a letter?

I didn't know if it was a letter or a note. But I know it was a prep talk between me and my future self. A prep talk to improve bit by bit, taking a small initiative to start expressing myself much more strongly than ever before. It's not only for writing; it's for me to become more aware of myself and stop being lazy.

Currently, it's between me and myself. However, it still carries the first day thought: me and for myself. Whenever I feel low, I start reading all my previous blogs. Not for motivation, but for the commitment I made to myself.

A commitment to choose becoming better over hesitation and laziness. I thought of giving up many times, but every time my inner voice held me back and pushed me to to express myself better than I did yesterday.

Being better and talking about it are two different things. Once I talked, I ended up doing nothing. But when I put in effort, I didn't need to prove it.

I know I did. I improved. Not much, just a bit. That's it.

The older version of me is not just me putting in effort to observe, to share, and to try finding mistakes. It's the courage given by writing; it's the version of me that writing slowly built. For me, writing has been a mirror reflecting my future self.

I wasn't disciplined, wasn't consistent, wasn't motivated, wasn't aware. But when I voiced myself through words, the tables turned for me.

Whenever I feel lost, I read my previous blogs. Either I rethink my thoughts or get a space to recall all my learnings from the journey. A few hours of calmness while reading, and things start falling into place.

Not letters, but me with myself. Same person talking through different notions.

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