Why Self-Awareness Leads to Overthinking (And Feels Like Pressure)

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Being self-aware is both a boon and a bane. It neither holds me back nor helps me grow faster. The more I know myself, the more my brain thinks. The self-aware spider makes a web of thoughts within the mind. Messy thoughts didn't just affect my words, they exhausted my energy, leaving me blank. Constantly thinking about improvement has become my pattern. Doing it continuously exposes my flaws and mistakes. And knowing the pattern makes it harder to ignore them. Whenever I think, my brain struggles between thoughts of flaws and improvement. Mental noise replaces clarity in this conflict. While writing blogs, clarity plays a significant role in giving words to the voice. But sometimes I fumble while writing words for my thoughts and learnings. I begin analysing in between more than expressing. I constantly look after the thoughts I write, ensuring they define my emotions and thoughts completely. Clarity struggles and turns into constant questioning. I remember a specific...

When Consistency Stops Feeling Forced: From Discipline to Identity

Despite feeling low and full of excuses, I still showed up and wrote. Once it was forced, but now it's normal. Neither my thoughts nor my consistency broke. But a shift from forced to voluntary feels energetic and has enhanced me to share myself more loudly.

What stopped me earlier became weaker with the passing of days- resistance. It didn't disappear completely but didn't make me hesitate in sharing my voice. With time, I had learnt resistance was just messy, immature thoughts I never allowed out. Either they were incomplete or irrelevant; they didn't come out due to the fear of hesitation and perfection.


Calmness gave me space to think beyond those immature thoughts resisting me from sharing my journey of expressing my voice and learnings. Patience and courage are good companions. Courage made sharing feel natural, not forced- just a pure voluntary routine. Discipline resisted the resistance that tried to stop me.

Slowly, discipline has become an identity. Initially, it was forcible, but with the passing of time, it has become honorary. Motivation just kickstarted my journey of effort to share, but discipline significantly maintains the streak to improve day by day, chasing perfection.

While writing it, I remember an incident from previous days. When I was just thinking of writing my blog titled Distraction, I noticed an unexpected improvement, making me feel just one step ahead. Thoughts were coming to me voluntarily; none of them were incomplete or irrelevant.

I was eager to share what I learned and experienced, which I didn't feel before. Days back, perspectives and viewpoints were present, but eagerness was missing. With time, keenness is showing the way to my voice, forcing force to step back.

Consistency didn’t become easier- I just became stronger than resistance.

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