Why Self-Awareness Leads to Overthinking (And Feels Like Pressure)

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Being self-aware is both a boon and a bane. It neither holds me back nor helps me grow faster. The more I know myself, the more my brain thinks. The self-aware spider makes a web of thoughts within the mind. Messy thoughts didn't just affect my words, they exhausted my energy, leaving me blank. Constantly thinking about improvement has become my pattern. Doing it continuously exposes my flaws and mistakes. And knowing the pattern makes it harder to ignore them. Whenever I think, my brain struggles between thoughts of flaws and improvement. Mental noise replaces clarity in this conflict. While writing blogs, clarity plays a significant role in giving words to the voice. But sometimes I fumble while writing words for my thoughts and learnings. I begin analysing in between more than expressing. I constantly look after the thoughts I write, ensuring they define my emotions and thoughts completely. Clarity struggles and turns into constant questioning. I remember a specific...
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How to Start Respecting Your Own Effort and Build True Self-Confidence?

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The day I understood my own value, my efforts got turned into results. I always remained in doubt whether I am doing good or if there is something I am lacking in. The day when my voice took the shape of words, my efforts knocked on the door of self-respect, which I was neglecting. Days continued, and slowly, I began understanding my worth in my own eyes.

Knowing my own value was definitely a turning point on this ongoing writing journey. Self-doubt never allowed me to express without hesitation despite having a lot within to share. The day I started expressing my voice as words, I felt I respected my words to start small. With the passing of days, fulfilling self-promises portrayed my positives.

With satisfied positives, I sensed a boost in my morale. The mistakes and flaws started decreasing with the passing of days. I remember a specific moment where it helped me maintain the writing streak. It was a day full of blank thoughts; I was completely drained of creativity. But a thought came out of self-respect and boosted my creativity to work beyond that exhaustion.

I had improved myself from zero by taking small steps of effort. If I skip even a day, it would cost me my promise of consistency. This thought changed all the circumstances going on in my mind. I took a pause for almost two hours. In those hours, I was just thinking not to lose my value in my own eyes. Losing respect in others' eyes doesn't affect much, but losing it in my own eyes gives birth to guilt.

With the guilt of breaking self-promises, self-confidence and courage start faltering. With these fearful thoughts, I didn't give up, and I completed writing and publishing my blog. I respected my effort that day to maintain consistency and boosted my morale to show up daily more calmly.

I understood how a small win adds up to progress. My effort itself became more valuable to me. Valuability had given me calmness to recognize my every single win, whether it's the choice of words or perfect grammar usage. Self-respect has always worked as strong roots to the tree of confidence and clarity.

With time, seeking validation changes to showing validation. Consistent actions are encouraging me to show it more.

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